We ’ve all listen examples of evolutionary idol : The chetah ’s satiny , long - legged consistency , build for speed on the African savannah , or the parrot ’s tough , ridged beak , ideally shaped for cracking open screwball . These adaption may make us wonder at nature ’s inventiveness and engine room skill . But you have it away what I love more than these shine examples of phylogeny ? The less refined animate being — the I that hold out despite being awkward , worthless , muck - covered , or altogether derisory .
I collect these evolutionary oddness on my web log , WTF , Evolution ? , and in thenew bookof the same name . In captions , I endeavor to reckon : If there had been a thought process behind these being , what would it have been ?
In reality , of course , evolution does n’t cogitate . It does n’t sit down down and design out the good course for an being to take . Instead , mutations pass off at random , the useful ones stick , and over fourth dimension they become adaptations that help the animal survive in its environment . But they ’re not necessarily the feature you ’d choose if you were designing something from scratch .
And if evolution were sentient ? Well , if the things it has created are any indication , then it would clearly be drop most of its clock time plastered , distracted , or entirely out of its mind . Below are just four examples of the more than 100 in thebook .
Pignose Frog
Scientific Name : Nasikabatrachus sahyadrensisHabitat : Wet forests in the Western Ghat Mountains of southern India
From WTF , EVOLUTION ? ! Workman Publishing . Photo © K Jayaram / Science Source
Really , Evolution ? You ’ve had 130 million years to run on the pignose salientian , and this is the good you could do ? Did you peradventure moil it too long ?
Galápagos Batfish
Scientific name : Ogcocephalus darwiniHabitat : Sandy Rand bottoms in the southeast Pacific
From WTF , EVOLUTION ? ! Workman Publishing . Photo © Mark Conlin / Getty Images
arrive on , Evolution , you could not be serious with this sh —
Oh , wait . OH . Ha ! I get it . Clearly , the red - lipped batfish is a work of satire , not mean to be taken as a genuine “ animal , ” which would of course be farcical . Sorry , I can be a bit boring sometimes . Nice one .
Banded Piglet Squid
Scientific name : Helicocranchia pfefferiHabitat : Up to 6,500 foot abstruse in the Pacific and Atlantic oceans
From WTF , EVOLUTION ? ! Workman Publishing . picture © Gary Florin / Rex USA
The shote calamari would seem to advise that Evolution ’s medication are work out . peradventure a trivial too well .
Tardigrade
Scientific name : Macrobiotus sapiensHabitat : Soil , damp moss , and consistency of water all over the world
From WTF , EVOLUTION ? ! Workman Publishing . pic © Eye of Science / Science Source
“ Okay . This is it . I just come up with the majuscule animal yet . ” “ This should be good . ” “ It ’s call a tardigrade . It ’s only half a millimetre long , so it ’s basically invisible . ” “ I see . ” “ It has precipitous claws for grabbing onto anything and a suck oral cavity for feeding . ” “ Seems sensible , Evolution . ” “ But here ’s the nerveless part : It can survive pretty much anything ! Drying out ? Freezing ? uttermost radiation ? It does n’t care . It just hunkers down and waits it out , then pops back to lifespan later on . ” “ Huh . I opine that is kind of cool . ” “ And it can even outlast in the void of outer space . ” “ What ? Why would it peradventure postulate to survive in outer distance ? ” “ You never know . ”
Mara Grunbaum is a science writer in New York City . Her bookWTF , Evolution ? ! A hypothesis of Unintelligible Designis usable now .
